Wednesday, January 25, 2012

The Mystery of Mutuality


The last couple of running days I’ve felt less than my best – ‘under the weather’ as they say.    Despite this, and in brave attempts to shake it, I have gotten out of bed and put those running shoes on.  Today was the 2nd of those two. 

I haven’t allowed myself to ‘wonder’ much lately.  Instead of living a mystery, I’ve really gotten into a habit of working something over in my mind until it makes sense to me.  As of this morning’s run, I’ve declared one certain mystery in my life: our two year old dog has come to mean the world to me.  It was her snoring in the next room this morning that quite literally got me out of bed.  As the alarm sounded I felt groggy and unmotivated.  Dorothy’s snores reminded me how much she likes to run in the morning, and from experience, I’m convinced our morning routine has definite personal benefits.

Once out on the road, Dorothy and I get into a groove that is again, unexplainable.  She trots happily along (at least that’s how I interpret her high steps and perked up ears) and in between being consciously present to my breathing and watching my posture, I glance down in pure joy that she is so happy.  It is that simple.  And that unexplainable.  Dorothy brings me joy, and bringing her joy brings me joy.  It is a positive reinforcing cycle.

My thoughts wandered to my faith.  What about our loving Creator God?  I’ve been listening to a precious gift my husband will give to the Benedictine Community in Oxford in a few days.  He interviews people for research as part of his business, and in his characteristic ‘stepping out of the box’ he interviewed Fr. Dan Homan, former prior and now deceased member of that community, during his studies on collaboration and on creativity.  (He usually targets highly successful people in multi-national corporations for such questions.)  Kerry, my husband, asked me to listen to the tapes he’d found of the interviews with Dan’s name on them, and help sort out which was which.  In response to Kerry’s questions on success, Fr. Dan spoke of his life mission: to let people know they are more than what they own and that they are precious in the eyes of God no matter what they do.  It is that simple.  And that unexplainable.  According to Fr. Dan, God looks at us with joy, especially when we are happy.

Another friend this week posted a list on Facebook of ‘What ifs.”  One was, “What if we said ‘I love you’ under our breath to each person we saw before we said anything else to them?”  Simple. Unexplainable – as least by today’s societal standards.  We are programmed to be skeptical, to be proper, to be vigilant and self-protective.  Being loving is mysterious because we’re supposed to save that for people that do nice things for us and don’t hurt other people.  Being so enamored by a four footed friend who’s always super excited to see you when you come home from work, and missing that friend when you are working long days is just a little too kooky for our ‘normal’ world.  God’s love is hard to put faith in – it’s too easy – too free – too invasive.

Maybe what’s so mysterious questioning ourselves about why we love so deeply; and questioning God’s love.  Our faith teaches us to embrace mystery.  What’s clear and explainable is that loving deeply makes the whole world a better place, by starting with the relationships that surround us every day.  Maybe as we progress in this, feeling happy and connected by watching others be happy won’t be so mysterious.  Mutuality will become comfortable.

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